STRUGGLE IN LOVE
Some hope held together by a string of imagination,
Some wishes keeping me alive with an aroma of expectation.
We facing the world together is the only thing I once believed,
Without you it has been ages since I’ve existed and not lived,
Every hour, every minute, every second when I breathe,
A bunch of memories of pain and anguish I wreathe,
Wouldn’t God scorn at the idea of separating two souls and use his power,
Or will I have to lie in my grave without receiving from you, some flowers?
Is this the way by which happiness of my life would end,
Or will I receive with this pain, laughter to blend?
The great lovers of this universe have never been together,
But didn’t you say that our love was forever?
You never meant a word you had said and always lied,
I’ve paid the price of trusting you and every night I've cried.
I know our souls are very far away, yet it feels so near,
I’ve already lost you, then why this fear?
When I got you, I felt like a princess without having been crowned,
With the solemn pledges of love, weren’t we bound?
I loved you so much, yet you put me aside,
And this is how the scars of your love leave meSmiling from outside but dying from inside.
Every night I used to read this poem I had written not long ago; it reminded
me of what I had lost.
A month had passed since I had heard from Aarav, my love, and two
weeks since college had started. In these two weeks, I had done nothing
besides weeping and writing poems. While the others were busy finding new
boyfriends and girlfriends, I was waiting for Aarav to come back. I didn’t like
to stay in college for long hours, though I always checked Aarav’s last seen
on WhatsApp every hour. Being at home made me feel closer to him. Perhaps
because he lived close to my house. I hoped every day that he would come
back, but deep inside I knew that he wasn’t a one-woman man.
Since, these were the initial days of college, we didn’t have many classes
to attend. Irrespective of what class I attended, I could concentrate only for
the first fifteen minutes.
I found one of my professors very cute, but then, it was not love. There
were many boys in my college whom I liked but then again, it wasn’t love. I
didn’t hang out much during those two weeks, for I had no good friends till
then. It was also due to the eagerness of reaching home early so that I could
take off the cover of the smiling face hiding my sadness. I had visited the
Kamla Nagar market once though, a must visit for the students of North
Campus of Delhi University, but only to buy books.
It was Monday again. In order to hide my poems from my mother, I used
to keep them in my college handbag. I put the recent one in my college
register.
“Hey Avantika! You left this,” Anamika said.
Anamika, Ritvik and Manvika were the people with whom I bonded
well. Anamika was holding out a sheet of paper. She handed it over to me. It
was my recent poem.
“From where did you get this?” I asked and was embarrassed at the
thought of her having read its contents.
“It had fallen down when you were taking your register from me. I
noticed it later. It is good by the way. I like the way you write. You never
told me that you write poems too.”“Oh yes, I do. Thank you,” I said.
“Wow! I write poems too. By the way, may I know whom is it addressed
to?” she asked.
“Nobody. I was just getting bored so I wrote it. Nothing serious,” I
replied, folding the paper and trying to divert her attention towards her crush.
She was single.
“Look he’s coming. Right behind you,” I said.
“Don’t change the topic. Come on! You can tell me. Who’s he?” she
persisted.
“Nobody,” I replied.
“Really?” she asked.
“Okay. I had a boyfriend. We broke up. I got emotional thinking about
the past one day and wrote it.”
“You loved him?” she asked.
“Yes,” I replied, clearing my throat.
“Awww. Don’t worry. We’ll look for a new guy for you. Come, come.
Forget that jerk.”
I smiled and went with her. From that day, we got really close.
https://mastermindanubhav.blogspot.com/2018/05/blog-post.html